Healthy Sexuality Part 1

??One of Satan?s cheapest and dirtiest tricks is to make profane that which is sacred??

-Elder Bruce C. Hafen

Today I want to address a topic that is intimidating to approach. My apprehension is not due to fear or discomfort around an admittedly often-tabooed topic, but rather, I am careful because I feel that addressing this topic requires me to figuratively take off my shoes as I approach hallowed ground. The topic is sexuality. Many who approach this topic are casual and cavalier and remove it from the context of the divine. Many completely degrade it and treat it as trash. Others fear and avoid it because they have been taught to do so. Ancient prophets warn against calling evil good and good evil (Isaiah 5:21). Through the counterfeiting of a true understanding of the nature of sexuality, many in our society falsely call evil good, good evil, or live in ignorance.

The intent of this post is to establish an understanding that sexuality is good and it is sacred. Upcoming posts will build on this foundation and address ways that parents can teach about sexuality and that couples can discuss sexuality within their intimate relationships. But before one can properly teach or discuss sexuality, they must understand it?s true nature.

President Spencer W. Kimball taught, ?In the context of lawful marriage, the intimacy of sexual relations is right and divinely approved. There is nothing unholy or degrading about sexuality in itself, for by that means men and women join in a process of creation and in an expression of love?

He also taught, ?The Bible celebrates sex and its proper use, presenting it as God-created, God-ordained, God-blessed. It makes plain that God himself implanted the physical magnetism between the sexes for two reasons: for the propagation of the human race, and for the expression of that kind of love between man and wife that makes for true oneness. His commandment to the first man and woman to be ?one flesh? was as important as his command to ?be fruitful and multiply.??

Sexual intimacy is ordained of God. It is holy. It was created to allow means of connection between husband and wife that is beautiful and divine.

Unfortunately, this truth is often hidden, lost or attacked. Media is rich with sexual innuendos, jokes, and other direct and indirect references to sexual relations between those both in and out of a marital context. Those who reserve sexual relations for marriage are often portrayed as being prudes and are mocked. In advertisements women are often dehumanized and sexualized. Pornographic material blatantly calls evil good as it sells images of various perversions of sex and the body. In all cases, sexuality is divorced from the divine, and often from the human.

And calling evil good isn?t the only threat. It is also detrimental to falsely call good evil. Many good people react to the pervasive counterfeit messages about sexuality by trying to shield others from such toxic perversions through instilling fear around the topic to the point that it becomes a taboo. They never talk about it. They blush or feel uncomfortable hearing the word ?sex?. They shudder when they hear the names of anatomical parts associated with the sexual response cycle. Couples don't talk with each other about what feels good and bad. Parents may shame or scold children who approach with questions, or who innocently parrot words or actions they learn from peers or media. In such instances, something that is by nature good is being responded to as though it were evil and bad.

In responding with fear, embarrassment and disapproval, such individuals fail to recognize or teach sexuality in the context of truth. When this happens the message that often comes across is a confusing one. The theme becomes, ?sex is dirty; save it for someone you love?. When children learn (and adolescents and adults believe) that sex is dirty, their choices are not informed. Rather than exercising their agency to show reverence and preserve purity, their choices are only aimed at avoiding something perceived as fearful. Furthermore, many who believe the distorted message that sex is dirty are at risk of later having anxiety-based sexual problems and associated marital problems.

Sexuality needs to be understood from the context of the divine. It should not be exploited nor should it be feared. It should be treated as sacred. Evil perversions should not be accepted as good, and overprotective projections of sex as evil should not be allowed to counterfeit what God has ordained to be good. Properly understood, sexuality is physically, emotionally and spiritually beautiful. It is a sacred gift from a loving Father in Heaven.

Upcoming blogposts will build upon this foundation and address common and damaging misperceptions and assumptions regarding sexual relations, how parents can engage in healthy sexuality education in the home, and how couples can appropriately communicate about sexual intimacy in their relationships.

Source: http://byuwsr.blogspot.com/2011/05/healthy-sexuality-part-1.html

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